Avoiding Emotional Over Eating And Minimizing Stress: Practice Saying No

Being stressed, overwhelmed and over-tired is one of the primary causes of over eating. When we are worn out, we are much less able to resist temptation and much more likely to try to sooth or revive ourselves by over eating.

My tip for minimizing stress-related emotional over eating: learn to say "no" so that you can say "yes."

We can only do what we can do. Really. And, if we want to do it well, we should usually only try to do one thing at a time. I've worked with many women who seemed to believe that if they tried hard enough or learned to get it just right, they would find a way to plant more hours in their day and get more done. Not true. Actually, sometimes the mark of a truly competent person is being able to say (with great truthfulness), "This is really all that I can do."

As much as our consumer-driven society would like you to believe it, more ISN'T necessarily better. In most situations, a job well done trumps more work in terms of how we end up feeling about it. Five pounds lost with comfort and forever feels much more satisfying than ten pounds lost in a carb fast that you know will come back as soon as you lose your "willpower" and eat toast again. The perfect gift that hits just the right chord is ten times more valuable than five gifts that the recipient doesn't value.

Try doing less.

My advice for lower stress: Move deliberately, at a pace and in a way that works for you. Know where you are going and move in that direction. In order to do those things, we need to know what we are passionate about--what drives us and where we want to go, and we need to know where and how we find our purpose--why we want to go where we are headed. We also need to be mindful of wrong turns and detours and bright shiny objects that might distract us from our path.

It's a great exercise to practice being alert for the detours and wrong turns--the requests and demands that pull on us that we really don't want or need to spend our energy on. Learn to be aware of them, and--I challenge you to practice saying, "No."

Saying "No" to the things you need to--dead weight obligations that drag you down and don't take you anywhere--creates powerful space and energy in your life for the things connected to your passion and your purpose. That is the space where quality comes from and that is the space where you will create the experiences that you will savor.

Here's my challenge for you: Make a list of three things or "obligations" (big or small) that are keeping you from spending your energy in more valuable places. Now, devise a way to either eliminate them (say "No"), or limit the time and energy they take in your life.

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